Tag Archives: goals

Weight Loss and Society: Who Has A Vested Interest In Your Progress?


Life As A Tug of War

Do you sometimes find yourself in a ‘them or me’ situation and don’t know what to do? Many of us do from time to time. It can be difficult sticking to decisions when you feel yourself pulled in another direction.

For example, a friend of mine recently confided that each time she decides to start a new exercise program or join a class, something bad happens to her (her words). Things like, one of her kids getting sick or a friend calling at the last minute and needing her help.

My friend had a complete list of reasons and events that had conspired to stop her from trying something new. Something which deep down she really wanted to do. So she gave up trying.

I’ll never get there, she finally concluded at the end of our conversation about people, circumstances, reasons, excuses, events, bad luck and the general negativity that surrounded her.  ‘ It could have been fun, but too many people want me to do too many things, ‘ she noted finally. I’m not sure whether she was still talking to me at this point or had begun talking to herself, but it didn’t matter. Her mind was made up.

Conflicting Goals

Funnily enough, my friend was right. She will never get there. At least not while she was continually sabotaging her own efforts by continuing to blame everything and everyone around her for her lack of action. In her defence, these events did actually occur. A close relative was ill and she had been visiting them often.

Kids also do need their mothers and friends do need a listening ear. However when we find ourselves keeping busy by being all things to all people, I think it’s time to stop, take a deep breath and reflect a little.

What We Believe

In contrast to what we are sometimes tempted to believe (that nobody really supports or helps us and everybody is conspiring against us) I actually choose to believe the opposite – that inherently other people are good and  that they really do want to see our lives work out for the best. Yes, they may have needs of their own but primarily, they also want the best for us and would love for nothing more than the chance to see us achieve what we set out to.

I guess what I am trying to say is that where my friend sees a contrast between what other people want from her (and is frightened of disappointing them) and what she wants (and is less worried about disappointing herself), I see no such contrast.

A Torch In The Dark

In my view, we  are all in this together.  Yes, we all need the support of friends, loved ones, family and sometimes from distant weight loss bloggers! As actress Whoopi Goldberg has said, “We’re here for a reason. I believe a bit of the reason is to throw little torches out to lead people through the dark.” 

My sentiments exactly, Whoopi.

However it doesn’t have to be a tug of war between ‘us’ and ‘them’.  Imagine how you would feel tomorrow if you stopped making the needs and wants of others an excuse for not doing things.  Picture yourself going to the things you want to – those workshops, those classes, a run/walk in the late afternoons or whatever it is you want to achieve and then imagine bringing all the fun and excitement back to those loved ones who you thought were stopping you.

It’s our choice: we can keep blaming others, society, our friends and family or we can understand that everyone has a vested interest in our progress, because we are all in this together.  It’s not you against the world, it’s you against you.

We care about your progress. Do you?



PS  If the above post leaves you feeling a little bit uncomfortable or annoyed, that is a good sign!  I only ever made big changes to my lifestyle and habits when I got uncomfortable and also altered my beliefs, attitudes and habitual thoughts.

PPS  Hope you can join us in a couple of days, for Fun Friday. We will lighten the mood and get ready for a great weekend 🙂 See you then 🙂


Avoiding The Weight Loss Blowout: How To Control Your Diet Choices and Stay Sane!

The Weight Loss Blowout

Okay so we’ve sworn off pizza for life, we don’t eat this and we don’t eat that….because we are trying to lose weight. Everybody knows that – our friends, our spouse, our workmates and so everybody should be doing their best to support us with our new resolution to eat healthy. Only they don’t.

Contrary to our own expectations, other people don’t always make things easy for us. In addition, certain events also come along to conspire against us.  The get together, the dinner party, the going away for someone at work party…..the list goes on. And for the person that is trying to follow a new and sensible eating plan, these events can sometimes be quite challenging. Often the very foods we have been succesfully avoiding for weeks or months suddenly make a BIG comeback  poking their sticky, gooey, sweet and calorific face in ours, tempting and begging us to eat them.

Impulsive Eating

Once upon a time, I would have had a lot of trouble at such food laden events. I would have eaten way too much and then gone home feeling pretty annoyed and regretful. These days though I like to employ a few strategies to help me through these unavoidable occasions. 

A Few Strategies

There is no doubt that when you’re in your own home or your own enviroment, self control is well, easier to control.   At home, once you’ve made up your mind to, you can clean out the pantry and get rid of the danger foods (you know the ones) that tempt you the most. This idea works because basically you can’t eat what isn’t there. 

Not so however, when you venture out.  This is when a little forward planning and mental preparation can make all the difference. 

First, take time to visualise the event you will be attending. Picture the people, the meal and see yourself standing or sitting there amidst it all.  See the tempting food.   Then, take time to decide there and then what (and how much) you will eat. Picture it on your plate. Smaller portions, healthy choices. Nothing more.

If a picture of a huge dessert or extra serves of a favourite food come into play while your doing this little mental exercise, try the following. Whilst still visualising the food, make a mental image of yourself shaking your head and saying no thanks. Yes, it’s simple. But it’s powerful and it works.

Repeat the visulisation as many times as you feel the need and then, when the event happens, your subconscious will already be programmed for better choices.

What Else?

Another trick is to pack your own healthy snacks and take them with you to the party or get together. If it is not a sit down meal with a set menu, but rather a table full of random food items, then having a healthy and prepared snack as a substitute, can be a life saver.

Lastly, never leave the house ravevously hungry!!  Always ensure you have had a filling (but calorie controlled) snack before going out.  Oh and don’t forget your water habit which I talked about a few posts ago. If you missed it and would like to have a read then, check it out here https://monsbiz.wordpress.com/2010/05/25/can-you-burn-fat-with-food/ 

The Last Bit

So dear friends….we all need to think ahead with our food choices when we are on a weight loss journey, especially when the amount and type of food presented is (seemingly) out of our control.  Don’t let the circumstance dictate your behaviour, but rather decide on your behaviour before the circumstance arrives.  It is possible to achieve. Why not try it next time such a time arrives for you? You may actually surprise yourself with just how well you can control your choices.

Hope these ideas are of help to you.  They certainly have worked for me! 

I would love to hear about any issues you may have encountered in trying to control your food choices. Do you find other people supportive or do you sometimes feel that others may be trying to sabotage your efforts? You’re not alone on your journey, you know.  Many of us have been through the same things, so feel free to talk or if you’re not comfortable with that, why not just say hi! 

Thanks for reading and thanks for being part of the Reframe Weightloss team.

Ciao everyone…..

Mon ( )

Slowing Down To The Pace Of Life – Some Time For You

The Simple Life

Hi there weight loss friends (and all),

In describing this blog to a friend the other day and discussing my aim to bring support and encouragment to those on their weight loss journey, I realised that most people would think that’s all I will talk about. The weight loss stuff…food…exercise…diet. 

Funny thing is though, although these elements are very important to us for health, general wellbeing and weightloss, there’s actually a bit more to ‘us’ than ‘the physical’ and sometimes those parts of ‘us’ need attention too.

As so much of life these days seems overly complex (iphones, apps, computers, mobile phones, message banks, non-human call takers…) there’s perhaps a good chance of overstimulating our minds or at the very least not taking enough time to recharge and revive.  Often we are meeting or trying to meet too many demands from work, family, business, friends and have too little time to just sit, reflect, remind ourselves of our goals or just breathe slowly and relax. 

So I thought I would encourage you today to do just that.  Take a little time to slow down, sit and do nothing and let your mind rest. 

It could do wonders for you.  And when you’re mind is calm and your thinking clearly, remind yourself of your goals and why you want to achieve them.

Recommit To Your Goals

Forget about those phone calls or that deadline, just for a minute.  You can go back to those things soon. They’ll still be there.

After you’ve taken this moment….I have one more suggestion for you to take on board.

Keep going!  Sometimes without support from family, friends or mentors, it can be tempting to just throw in the towel and give up.  But I’m here, offering you the encouragement to keep going. 

You’ll get there!

Enjoy the peace dear friends,